2Newlyweds: Dishwashing Saga: Dummies in the Kitchen

Dishwashing Saga

Dummies in the Kitchen

So, I'm cleaning the kitchen the other day, right. Rinse the plate, put in the dishwasher. Repeat about 50 times. I'm feeling pretty good as a new wife: Made my husband a great dinner, had a great day at work, paid some bills. Yay, I can be married! I cheer. I'm totally an adult.

When the dishwasher is sufficiently full -I proceed to fit 5 more dirties there- and then reach for the cleaning solution. Like any normal human, my husband and his former roommate stored the detergent under the sink, which is conveniently located next to the washer. There's a box of cascade and a bag of those square cubes with the gel attached. Yay, you know the ones, they have a thin plastic coating around them that dissolves in water. I grab a cube and pop it into the little square cutout in the washer. "Hey, babe," I question, "I can't get the lid to shut on the detergent compartment. How did you guys do this?"

"I don't know. I always used the box of Cascade. Just try to smash it in there." he coaches.

I attempt to smash the cube.

Me: "It's not working".

Hubberkins: "Um, just set it on top of this bowl."

Me: "Seriously? Will the work?"

Hubberkins: "Sure, why not? The whole thing dissolves in the water, right?"

Me: "I don't know. I thought the lid opened up and something magical happened to the soap."

Hubberkins: "Magical? What?"

Me: "I don't know. Let's try it."

Fast forward to the next evening when I'm putting away the newly-washed dishes.

Me, thinking to myself: Wow, smells good in there.

Put away dishes 1,2,3

Me: Wow, it really smells good. Kind-a home-y.

Away go dishes 10,11,12

Me: This is really nice. Smells like my mom's laundry. I wonder what kind of soap this is?

I reach under the sink cabinet and grab the bag of soap, which, until this point, has been facing away from me.

Tide?... I didn't know Tide made dishwashing detergent. I thought they only made laundry soap. Wait a second…. DAHHHHHHH!!!!!! This IS laundry soap! No. No. NO. I can't be that dense. There's no way I put laundry detergent in my washing machine.

I peak at the bag again. "Ahhhhhh.” I'm retarded.

Epic fail.